Wednesday, February 13, 2008

GONNA BE A BEAR


In this life I am a woman. In my next life I'd like to come back as a bear.
When you're a bear you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.
Before you hibernate you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that too.
When you're a girl bear you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs.
I could definitely deal with that.
If you're a mama bear everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line you swat them too.
I could deal with that.
If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.
Yup, gonna be a bear!